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According to Wikipedia, the infinity symbol evokes the image of “an eight on its side”. When I asked someone what they thought about it, that is indeed what it looked like to them. But even after becoming aware of that perspective, it was not until thinking about it for a while that I could understand how someone could see it that way. Perhaps because I’m visually critical, but even now, to say it looks like “an eight on its side” seems like a stretch to me.
But the existence of this symbol is very meaningful to me, because it provides a visual connecting point for several apparently remote aspects of reality, and life. What I find particularly important about the symbol, is how two never-ending points joint perfectly in the middle, and then branch out again, continuing the cycle. On a side note, this reminds me of how the Fahrenheit and Celsius scales are different at all degrees, but are the same at (-40). I think that the convergence of opposite depicted in this symbol can teach us a lot about life.
Until fairly recently, I believed that I trusted everyone, hated no one, and feared nothing.
But then I realized that it was quite the other way around, and the more I realized this, the more I struggled with myself, as the illusion of compatibility with reality faded. Not just those three differences- my entire world began to turn upside down, as I realized that what I believed in, lived my life for- every idea of reality that I relied on, was a fake. I had fooled myself. Sometimes I wish that I had stayed fooled- at least then I would think I was happy. And as the line between illusion and reality blurs, is there really any difference between illusionary happiness and real happiness. And even if there is, would such a difference be worth fighting for?
Perhaps part of why I was able to live in that pretend world of mine for so long, or as I came to call it, “dream”, is because at the convergence between reality and illusion was the same as that between one half of infinity and the other. It might be that in the spirit of “Absolute Value”, there is no “real” difference between love and hate, between faith and doubt, between fear and desire, or even death and life. Perhaps these differences only exist to justify our existence, to create “meaning” out of an otherwise meaningless existence.
In response to the question of what sets humans apart from plants and animals, I would say the “consciousness”. But if we did not have the consciousness, would it really be much different? There are many times that I space-out, or act without being aware of those actions. Most of the time, I perform better when I’m not conscious of my actions.
If time is an agent of evolution, and were divided into the three basic components, I would refer to Aristotle’s 3 souls to understand the role of our consciousness:
(1) Plants– Only has awareness of the present. Because of this, plants also have no sense of time, and no memory. Everything is done exclusively “in the moment”. In Freud psychology, it would spiritually be “pure Id”.
(2) Animals– Has awareness of the past and present, but not of the future. Thus, they have a limited memory and sense of time. Everything done is either “in the moment”, or learned from the past. They cannot plan ahead. Animals would possess an Id (present) and an Ego (past), but no Superego (future).
(3) Us– the only “real” difference between us and the rest of nature is that we have “a future”. I think that the purpose of this difference is “Autoevolution”– having a Superego permits us to think far enough ahead that we are able to compensate for environmental changes enough the evolution is no longer necessary.
I apologize if the title implied discussion of something more “sentimental” in nature, but right about now I’ve decided that it’s better to write something more journalistic (i.e. random) in nature than nothing at all (which for the most part I have been).
Getting back to “facing reality” though:
As I wander in my thoughts regarding my identity, what sort of meaning that I should accept of this cruel reality…I don’t know if I’ve ever really accepted “reality”. Perhaps I don’t even know how. But I’m probably just afraid. Afraid that I can’t handle it. By explaining these things using sophisticated explanations and amply supported justification, I can take away the meaning of just about anything. there is nothing to be afraid of, because everything is accounted for. But even so, I know that I’m just lying to myself. I know I’m full of shit. I know that they’re just rationalizations I create to allow for a substitute reality, one that, like demonstrated in the infinity symbol, appears so close to reality that even an intelligent person like myself- or rather, especially an intelligent person like myself can’t tell the difference.
Well of course I can tell, but I’ve found that there is a big difference between being aware of something and accepting it- an utterly huge difference. The more that I acknowledge certain things, the more surreal, the more fake they become. so I cunningly fool myself in this way- ironically I’m able to so easily reject reality by acknowledging it.
So even though I may think about, and talk about what I should be doing, how terrible a person I am, how irresponsible I am, or criticizing others in this way- that *actually* makes me feel better, because it gives off the illusion that I’m in control. And even though I know I’m not in control, and that my reality is fake- that these rationalizations are rationalization, and I know I’m fooling myself- rather, I can fool myself even better then, because the moment I acknowledge is everything becomes meaningless, because there is nothing not accounted for. Or rather, there might as well be nothing, because even though I am aware of these things, I will not accept anything that is not accounted for. I am most afraid of the unknown, and I’ve become so alienated from reality, that it’s become my worst nightmare. Because I can’t handle it, I’ve created for myself this substitute.
But in accordance with Balance (be it perhaps the “Balance” within my “perfect world”) there is a price for everything, even if that “something” is fake. And the price of rejecting reality- I believe to ultimately be suffering. But then again, I already went into this in the last post :P
April 24, 2009 at 4:48 pm
“an eight on its side” – This is how many people find it easiest to DESCRIBE the 2D symbol to others… properly depicted, it shouldn’t look like an eight since eights should always have half that is smaller than the other whereas this symbol for infinity should be symetric. Originally arabic numerals WERE on their sides… non-arabs use them differently.
“two never-ending points joint perfectly in the middle” – there is ONE point at the ‘junction’, however this is in a two dimensional respresentation only… no points should touch in three dimensions.
“They cannot plan ahead. Animals ” – First, you are an animal. More importantly though, animals can plan ahead and there is so much evidence of this that I will not list any.
“environmental changes enough the evolution is no longer necessary.” – Evolution is a series of changes, one thing EVOLVES into another despite if you are using the term to refer to Natural Selection or not.
“reality” – I think you mean your perception of truth. Reality = Reality, you make NO difference.
A few things to think about:
Why not just a circle, or the outside of a sphere or any shape that connects to itself. Go walk around your house until you find the ‘END’… keep going even if you pass the same doors… keep going until you find the ‘END’
Symetry has NOTHING to do with the concept of infinite…
Why give new or personal meanings to an existing symbol when symbols are explicitly created to express a specific meaning?
May 1, 2009 at 8:18 pm
Jim @ I appreciate your comments, and my lack of commitment to framing my writing in such a way that you, and other people, could properly understand, has resulted in you completely missing the whole proverbial point. In all honesty, I do not care nearly as much as I should about what people think, and have made only minimal efforts in wording my writing in such a way that others can understand my writing on some level. But it’s important that you understand that your preoccupation with trivial and philosophically irrelevant matters- that is, your bias, has caused you to completely miss the point- my part in this was to aggravate your bias, but ultimately that is your responsibility. I have the same bias, granted, and I learn each day to try to rid myself of it as much as possible; I ask you to do the same.
Your comments remind me of myself in that many times I have analyzed and criticized a joke in an attempt to understand it, inadvertently killing the joke, and then slaughtering the corpse until nothing is left. I can get some entertainment out of you doing this, being a cynic and lover of satire myself, but I think you should know that doing so “for the sake of argument” ultimately does nothing but such the life and meaning out of my otherwise potentially meaningful and inspiring words.
Since you have not read enough of my writing, you may not understand this (and as such when I get around to this I’ll put it on my “About” page so that people are less likely to misunderstand) but I really don’t care about whether or not anything I write or think about is “right” “true”, or “real”, either in my eyes or anyone elses. To understand certain things, many times I must use premises which contradict what I normally hold true– that’s what you call “think outside the box”, and I apologize if that sounds condescendings– no offense intended.
On the contrary though, for you, I, or anyone to measure the value or anything based on whether or not it is objectively “right”, “true” or “real”, or by their antithetical counterparts, would quite frankly be “missing the point”, and that is unfortunately what you have presumably done inadvertently. If you wish to gain any meaning or value from my writing, you must first take into account to judge my words based not as you formerly did, but rather by what potential my words hold– how they might possibly influence, impact, and inspire this world.
As such, there is no reason for me to give any defense for any of your cited “sophist” arguments, because such arguments are irrelevant, since they are missing the point.